Our Father’s Day was very low key this year. Mark had to work so that kind of put a damper on things. We were all able to go to church together, pray over all the dads in attendance, and hear a wonderful message about the importance of fathers who both teach and live out a Godly example for their children. The visiting pastor was spot on and even convicted me about a few things. You can download the message (“Ingredients For A Good Father”) here if you’re interested. http://www.fsbctucson.net/podcast/index.php?page=1
Afterwards, we gave Daddy his gifts, had a special dinner, and cake. I didn’t really do a theme this year. Since I was instructed (by Mark) to keep it low key. He had been EXTREMELY clear that he was to get nothing! But I had already gotten a couple of presents and the boys made a few things as well. A book by a fave radio host (Dennis Prager) and the History Channel’s mini-series “The Bible” on DVD. The boy’s made funny fill-in-the blank letters for him. And Townsend made a cute picture frame at school.
I have always believed the saying that “cooking is love made visible.” So, making a special meal is important to me. Mark’s special meal was Peach Whiskey Chicken, Mashed Potatoes, Basil Pesto Cream Pasta, and Pumpkin Bread. Love on a plate…..there you go! 🙂
Whenever Father’s Day has rolled around in the past, I am always so excited and full of ideas for a great cake to bake for my man. But this year, the inspiration was soooo not there. I turned to Pinterest for help and did see this photo that gave me an idea. “Hmmm I could use that idea in a cake.”
So, I covered his cake in Reese’s Pieces, wrote (badly…..I write just terribly in icing) “We love you to pieces,” and called it a day. That was all I got this year. Pretty slack compared to the grill cake, Super Dad cake, and tool box cakes of year’s past. But, I think he still felt loved.
Wrapping it up……fatherhood in the Autism world is nothing remotely close to a cake walk. Accepting the diagnosis is the first major hurdle. Coming to terms with the fact that your child may never play ball with you, enjoy any of the same things, and/or follow in your footsteps is a very difficult hurdle to get over. And even once you do that….adjusting to the normalities that come with the disorder……constant screaming, stimming, flailing, self destructive behaviors, public meltdowns, and such can also hold one back not just from the road to acceptance but any sort of happiness whatsoever. We pray daily for all kiddos with Autism. Those that we know…..by name. And those whose names we don’t know. We pray for their parents as well. For strength, courage, a fighting spirit, and the endurance to get up each day and do it again. Lastly, I want to share with you this great poem I found. It does such a great job of describing how a child with Autism feels vs. expresses love for their Daddies. It is “different but not less” than other children.
For all the “Warrior Dads” out there….. Much love!
An Autism Father’s Day
I may not shower you with kisses
And hug and squeeze you tight
But I wouldn’t want any other daddy
To tuck me in bed at night
I may not always hold your hand
Or do exactly as I’m told
But it’s because I have Autism
Not because I’m being bold
I may not make you a card
But it’s not that I don’t want to
Sometimes Autism stops me
From doing the things I’d like to do
I may not have many words
To express just how I feel
But I want you to know daddy
That my love for you is real
I may not return your affection
When I know you want me to
But I know you understand
And you know that I love you
I am your child with Autism
And you’re the daddy that I adore
I may not always show it
But I couldn’t love you more
By Donna Woods